You And I And A Plus Sign
by I-Want-You-Not-2-Give-Up-On-Me
Summary: They agreed to be friends… With benefits. No feelings, just sex. However, everything changes in more way than one.
1. Chapter 1

Authors note: Hello! I said I was done, but I'm a liar so I'm back. I won't be continuing any of my old stories because I lost inspiration to keep writing them and I might have also thrown out the outlines for them. However, if you'd like to know how they would have ended if I had of continued them you can always private message me and I'll be happy to tell you. But anyways! It's my new years resolution to finish a fanfic and I really hope I do, But enough chit chat, and onto my new story. R&amp;R

Disclaimer: Degrassi is still pretty shit, so I would never want to take any credit for the show.

Summary: They agreed to be friends… With benefits. No feelings, just sex. However, everything changes in more way than one.

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_**You And I And A Plus Sign**_

Chapter One

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There it was again; that annoying beeping that woke Clare up every morning for work and sometimes on the weekends when she would forget to shut off her alarm. She groaned and with her eyes still shut she reached for the off button and stretched. After two minutes or so, she sat up rubbing the sleep from her blue eyes and yawned. She loved the mornings, but hated the getting up and out of bed part.

Once she was out of bed, she headed to the bathroom and proceeded with her necessary morning routine: going to the washroom, taking a shower, drying her hair, curling her hair, brushing her teeth, putting on her makeup and getting dressed. She slipped on a conservative black dress and paired it with a black jacket. Then she was out the door and off to work.

It was Thursday and she could already imagine the amount of letters, paperwork and books she had to go through before she could go home later that night. She wasn't complaining though. Clare Edwards was a workaholic and loved every second she sat editing a new story to be published.

Clare gripped the door and pulled it open to walk into her favourite little-yet-popular coffee shop that just so happened to be owned by her best friend.

"Hey, Edwards."

"Good morning, B." Clare smiled brightly as she hung up her coat on the back of one of the bar chairs before sitting in it.

"Someone is happier than usual." The tall girl said "what's up?" Bianca slid a cup of coffee, towards her. It was hot, just the way she liked it.

"Thanks." Clare said, holding onto the cup. Clare only shrugged at her words though. "Can't a girl smile without reason?"

Bianca threw a cloth over her shoulder and placed a hand on her hip, "You only smile that big when you've finished editing a book or got laid the night before." She said matter-of-factly. "So… Which one is it?"

Clare blushed and looked down at her steaming cup, "Eli came over last night."

"Ah ha! I knew it." Bianca smirked.

"Nothing happened, Bianca." Clare told her then took a sip.

"I don't believe that."

"It's the truth." Clare set the cup down and bit her tongue for a second before speaking. "… We watched a movie, he made popcorn… It was nice. I wasn't feeling great last night so we didn't do anything… for a change." Clare smiled again, recalling the memory.

The dark haired girl let out a breath through her nose and pushed her lips to side, like she was thinking. It was clear to Clare that Bianca already knew what she was going to say. The girl doesn't have a filter most of the time.

"You are so head over heels for him." She finally said.

"No." Clare argued.

"Clare. I know you and I see the way you look at him when we're all hanging out." She paused. "You've looked at him like that since high school."

"You're crazy, Desousa." Clare said and took another sip from the cup.

"And you're in denial."

Clare rolled her eyes playfully at her friend and got up, "I've gotta go."

"Call me later."

"I will."

Bianca blew her a kiss, Clare picked up her coffee and went off to a long day at work.

Later that day….

A knock on Clare's door caught her attention and she cursed quietly. Clare glanced over at her clock and it was the time they had planned for him to come really did fly. Earlier when they had made plans she felt fine and she couldn't wipe the smile off of her face but now all she wanted to do was sleep but she didn't want to disappoint him.

With her fuzzy warm blanket wrapped around her, Clare went and answered the door. "Hey." She said with a slight smile.

Eli smirked at her and Clare just about melted. Maybe Bianca was right. Maybe she had fallen head over heels for this boy. Maybe she had been on the ground since the day they met back when they were teenagers attending Degrassi. But she had to remind herself that it was just sex and feeling weren't allowed. But he stood there, dressed in black from head to toe and her heart fluttered and her smile widened and she wanted to kiss him, cuddle him and sleep next to him without sleeping with him.

"I brought your favourite." He said holding up two bags of sushi.

Then the smell hit her and it made her sick to her stomach and she shook her head at him. "Get rid of it." She told him, moving away from him.

Eli came in and shut the door behind him placing the bags on the kitchen island. "What?" He asked confused.

"The smell…" She said, "It's making me sick."

"Are you still not feeling well?" He asked, kicking off his shoes.

Clare shook her head and went back to the spot on the couch when she had been sitting before he showed up. "It was nice of you... But I don't think I can stomach that right now."

The dark haired boy nodded and picked up the bags then placed them in the fridge before going over and sitting next to Clare.

She leaned against his shoulder and sighed, "I'm sorry." She whispered as Eli moved an arm around her and held her lovingly. "I know you came over so we could have sex… But I'm tired and now the sushi smell made me nauseous…" She stopped the second Eli started chuckling. "Why are you laughing?" She asked him almost bitterly.

"I care about your health more than I care about having sex with you." He told her and kissed her forehead. That made Clare smile so she hid her face in his chest.

"How about we finish that movie?" He asked after a second or two.

Clare lifted her head from his chest and nodded, "I'd like that, Elijah."

He glared a bit as he moved from the couch to put the movie on from where they left off the night before, "I regret telling you my full name."

"Elijah's a hot name." Clare spit out before covering her mouth in embarrassment then she giggled at Eli's expression.

Eli re-joined her on the couch and Clare snuggled into his lap as they continued watching the movie.

That night Clare tossed and turned until the morning hours. She couldn't get comfortable; she couldn't let her mind rest for a second. She still felt sick and no matter how much she insisted Eli go home so he wouldn't get sick, he would not leave.

Clare turned over again, facing the sleeping boy beside her in her bed and she smiled at the sight despite the awful churning in her stomach. He looked so peaceful, so beautiful as he slept. His slight snoring didn't bother her. She was glad he stayed, he brought her comfort.

She moved towards him a bit and placed a very soft kiss upon his lips. He started to move some and she knew that she must have woken him up. It wasn't her intent but her alarm was going to go off soon and she was sure he didn't want to be woken up by that. So she kissed him again.  
"Eli." She whispered.

He groaned, she shook his shoulder. Eli turned over on his other side, she ran her hand down his bare back and giggled quietly.

"Eli." She said again.

"Clare." Eli whined almost.

Clare turned over and sat up quickly which she discovered about five seconds later was a horrible idea because it only made her feel worse. She pressed off the alarm clock and stood up.

"It's five o'clock in the morning, are you kidding me?" Eli asked, sleep still in his voice.

"Sorry." She mumbled, glancing at him.

She watched him sit up and she watched him try to hide a smile and she watched his expression change to concern as her face dropped and he must have picked up on it. Clare left the room quickly, running to the washroom, not bothering to shut the door after her. She kneeled down in front of the toilet and started vomiting. She felt herself break a sweat as she emptied her stomach.

Eli came in the bathroom and if it wasn't for the fact that she was feeling horrible she would be embarrassed that he was witnessing her throw up. He sat down on the edge of the bathtub and held her hair up and out of her face, whispering things that Clare didn't care enough at that moment to comprehend.

Tears were rolling down her face by the time she was finished. She hated throwing up, she hated the way it reminded her of the months she spent in the hospital when she was a teenager. She just hated the hospital.

"Come on." Eli said concern laced through his voice.

"I... I have to get ready for work." She told him, reaching up to flush the toilet.

"No way."

"What?"

"You're sick; you have to stay home, Clare." He told her, passing her a cloth.

Clare sighed taking it from him and got up from the ground slowly. Clare went to the sink and wet the cloth as Eli sat. She wiped her mouth and threw the cloth in the hamper before pulling out her tooth brush and starting to brush her teeth.

"Clare." Eli said after about a minute or so.

"What?" Clare said after spitting in the sink then putting the brush back.

"Stay home. Get better."

"…Fine." She mumbled.

The girl started to tear up then and walked out of the bathroom. By the time she made it back to bedroom she was sobbing. She sat on the edge of the bed and cried in her hands. The bed moved and she knew he was sitting next to her, he wrapped his arms around her and she held on to him like it was life or death.

The dark-hair boy kissed her forehead lovingly before saying, "Do you want me to stay with you?"

She nodded against his chest, "Please."

"I'm not going anywhere."

The words only made her sob harder and she didn't know why. She didn't know why she was crying to begin with. All she knew was that she was emotional all of a sudden.

Eli rubbed her arm up and down lightly, "Now what's wrong?"

"I don't know." She cried. "I-I don't know… I'm sorry."

"Why are you sorry?" He said quietly.

"I'm crying like an idiot."

Eli pulled away and Clare glanced at him but quickly looked away again. He placed his hand under her chin, making her look at him. "No." He said simply. "You're not an idiot… And never say sorry for letting out how you feel."

Clare took a breath and nodded before moving away and wiping her tears away. "I just want it to stop." She told him.

"Want what to stop?"

"Feeling sick." She said throwing her arm up in the air. "I'm always tired and can keep barely anything down… I'm scared." She said.

"Clare…"

"What if… what if the cancer's back?" She choked.

Eli looked away shaking his head. "Don't say that."

Even though he was turned away mostly, she could basically see the sadness on his face. She wasn't an idiot; she knows he likes to hide how he feels just as much as she does. He was there almost every second that she was sick back when they were teenagers; he never left her side unless the doctors made him. He saw her in her darkest moments. Losing her hair, going through surgeries, the chemo, everything.

She didn't want to say it but there's always been a risk that it might come back. She didn't want to say it, or think it or ever go through it again but she couldn't just ignore it. That's what happened the first time; she ignored her body trying to tell her something was wrong. She ignored it until she ended up in the hospital. She's learned since then but that doesn't mean she's any less scared of what might be going on with her.

"Don't fucking say that." Eli said again when Clare went quiet for a minute or so.

"The doctors said there's a risk it can come back, Eli." Clare played with her fingers.

"I wish there wasn't." He said sadly.

Then Clare started to tear up again, "I don't want to go through that again, Eli." Her bottom lip quivered and Eli pulled her to him again.

"Come on, Don't cry." He cooed. "You're just throwing what-if's into the air. Make an appointment with your doctor, that's the only way you'll be able to find out."

Clare let out a deep breath and sighed "Okay." She whispered. "I'm probably worrying about nothing."

"You tend to do that." He chuckled getting up from the bed. "Try sleeping? I'll go get breakfast from Bianca." He said. "And I'll call in for you."

Clare nodded getting back under the covers. "Thank you." Clare smiled slightly. "Will you tell her I'm sorry that I didn't get around to calling her last night?"

"Anything else?" Eli asked, changing into fresh clothing. He has his own drawer.

"I ran out of pickles. Can you get some?" She asked.

Eli came over, leaned down and pecked her lips. "I'm on it." He kissed her again and went to leave the room. Before leaving, he gripped the door knob and turned to look at her "Hey, Clare… You've probably just got a bad case of the flu… Or you're pregnant."

Clare rolled her eyes, "You're hilarious, Goldsworthy."

"I know." He smirked and left the room.

Clare heard the door shut and her mind began to wander. However she quickly dismissed the thoughts. The doctors said she would never be able to conceive.

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So? Should I continue?

Let me know with a review maybe?


	2. Chapter 2

**Authors note: Hello! You all blew me away with how many people wanted me to continue this so that's what I'll be doing. So you all better be excited... Or not that's entirely up to you. Also forgive me for how long it takes to get an update, my cousin take 12 years to edit it, so sorry. Not much to say other than that so read and review! It always makes my day to see a new review.**

**Disclaimer: Degrassi is still pretty shit, so I would never want to take any credit for the show.**

**Summary: They agreed to be friends… With benefits. No feelings, just sex. However, everything changes in more way than one.**

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**You And I And A Plus Sign**

**Chapter Two**

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Clare waited nervously in the room by herself. It was exactly two weeks after Eli had told her to go to go see a doctor and Clare didn't know why she came alone. She was terrified but she didn't want to bother Eli with her doctor's appointments again, nor did she want to bother Bianca with her shop being so busy with only a few staff. She most definitely did not want to bother her parents and see them worry and cry over the fact that maybe they'll have to bury their daughter. She didn't want to bother anyone, she never even told anyone that she had an appointment that day, but now she sat on the examination bed as her nerves got the better of her, shaking lightly. She bit her lip and tasted blood.

The doctor had just gone to grab something from the other room. She seemed to be taking an agonizingly long time however and clare just wanted her to come back and for all of this to be over with. The anticipation was the worst part of it all. Clare's nerves often made her zone out, but perhaps her nervousness is what dragged out the time.

Clare felt as if an hour had gone by in the time the doctor took to grab the mystery thing. She walked back into the small room and Clare glanced up at the much older lady. She was completely comfortable with her as she had been her doctor for her entire life.

Clare mustered up a small greeting smile once again and glanced at what she held in her hand. It was a small portable something.

"Sorry I took a bit." Doctor Maria said placing the rectangular case on the table that pulled out from the bed.

"It's fine." Clare said, but her nerves were heard in her shaky voice.

"I'm going to get you to lie down, okay, Clare?" The lady said and then gave her a small smile, "And I don't believe you should be so nervous."

Clare nodded and did what the doctor said. She turned her head to watched her open the case and her eyes widened a bit. An ultrasound machine. The doctor moved Clare's shirt up as she pressed a few buttons on the small portable machine. Clare held her breath and she moved her hands to hold the shirt so the doctor wasn't setting up the machine one handedly.

Doctor Maria took the small transducer from it and squeezed some blue gel from a small bottle onto Clare's lower stomach. It wasn't as cold as Clare thought it would be, kind of warm. Clare closed her eyes then, she didn't want to see. She didn't want to see whatever the doctor was trying to show her if it was bad. She didn't even know what the doctor was looking for but if it were a tumour or anything life threating, she would rather be told and not see it because then that would make it all the more real.

Clare felt Doctor Maria move the transducer around and around, pressing buttons, but then she stopped and Clare still didn't open her eyes.

"Clare?"

"Hmm?" Clare managed to get out.

"I told you that you had nothing to worry about."

"What?" Clare said confusion laced through her voice. She opened her eyes looked over at the small screen and a small gasp fell from her lips.

"Miss. Edwards… You're pregnant. "

"No." Clare shook her head, but a smile was growing on her face. "No, I can't believe that. I can't have kids…. The chemo..." Clare said in complete disbelief.

"Sometimes doctors are right, Clare, and sometime we're wrong." She said. "You are indeed pregnant." She pointed to the small screen, even though Clare could tell already. "That's your baby."

Then her eyes filled with tears. Happy tears, as she realized she expected the worst walking into this room. She thought the cancer was back and she was going to be spending lots of time in the hospital again, she thought she was going to have to relive the darkest time in her life. She never considered the possibility of walking in and being told she was expecting her first child.

"Really?" She said trying to hold back her tears "I'm really pregnant?" She cried.

"Really, really."

**About a week later…**

Clare was a few minutes later to Bianca's coffee shop than usual. As Clare pushed the door open she hoped the tall dark haired girl hadn't noticed. But Clare came every weekday at the same time and there was usually no one in the shop yet so Bianca was sure to notice her coming in late, though she still hoped she wouldn't.

She had a shower the night before giving Clare time to sit down and read this morning before leaving her apartment. She lost track of time as her nose was buried in one of the 10 pregnancy books she bought.

Clare slid up on to her usual chair and Bianca raised an eyebrow at her. "Eli keep you busy this morning?" She asks in a teasing tone.

"No, not Eli." Clare answered. "Oh! And remember decafè."

Bianca nodded and started to put the coffee together for Clare. "What was it then?"

Clare sighed, Bianca noticed her being late. " I.. I was reading." Clare shrugged.

"Don't you do enough of that at work?"

"I like to read." Clare replied, chewing on her bottom lip.

Bianca made a face and passed her the coffee. "The book was that wonderful, huh?"

Clare held the coffee with both hands, absorbing its heat. "It was educational." She replied simply.

"And what did it teach you." Bianca laughed slightly.

"Um… It taught me that my baby is about 4 inches long… And about as big as my fist." Clare said putting her hand into a fist and holding it up to look at it. Clare smiled slightly and she glanced at Bianca who had the biggest confused look on her face that Clare had ever seen up to date.

"You said 'My baby'" Bianca said.

"I know what I said." Clare said trying to hold back a smile.

"You're pregnant?!" Bianca asked in disbelief.

"14 weeks and counting."

"Oh my god, Clare!" Bianca said happily. The girl came around from the other side of the counter and threw her arms around Clare. Clare let out a giggle as she held her best friend for a moment or two.

"I can't believe this." Bianca said pulling back from the hug. "I'm going to be an auntie!" She said jumping a bit before sitting down in the chair beside Clare.

"Here." Clare said pulling out her small over the shoulder bag. She unzipped one pouch and pulled out the small sonogram photo. Clare passed it to her and Bianca took it, a hand flying to her mouth to try and contain her happiness.

"This is so great, Clare." Bianca said her eyes never leaving the photo.

"I just hope Eli thinks that too." Clare mumbled.

"You haven't told him?"

Clare shook her head. "I'm going to… tonight."

**That afternoon…**

Clare pushed away from her desk and stood up from the chair. It was time for lunch and Clare was ecstatic that Eli had called earlier inviting her to grab lunch with him. Eli worked only a few blocks away at CanadianBuzz, where he produces youtube videos. Clare had been there a few times with Eli to be in a few of his episodes and while she was there she could tell just how happy that job made Eli. Clare was surprised how well it played too.

The pregnant girl grabbed her purse and left her office, shutting the door behind her.

"Ms. Edwards!" The voice of the new assistant called.

Clare stopped and turned in the direction of the voice and she smiled slightly.

"…I have all the letters filled out and ready."

"Great, Alice, just give them to Steve and tell him to deliver them."

She nodded and turned away but quickly turned back. " Oh.. And congratulations."

Clare made a face, laughing slightly, "For what?" She asked confused.

"I saw you reading 'What to expect when you're expecting'… so I assumed that you were pregnant or at least thinking about it.."

Clare nodded now with a nod of her head. "Right... I am... So thank you."

"I think you'll be a lovely mother." Alice said with a happy expression on her face.

"Finger crossed." Clare laughed quietly, backing away.

Alice crossed her fingers and Clare turned around the right way. She got off the elevator and exited the building a few minutes later.

As she began her short walk to the quiet lunch restaurant Eli and her enjoyed she wondered if she should tell Eli at lunch. It would be just the two of them; she could show him the sonogram while they eat. Then they could talk about things since there is a lot to talk about. They could make decisions on the little things and most importantly she'd be able to see his reaction.

But as she got closer to the restaurant she decided she could wait for tonight, where they could be alone instead of in public. She'd call him later and ask him to come over if he already hadn't made his way over since most days he did without her asking him to.

Clare could practically smell her favourite chicken bean salad from where she stood at the cross walk just across the street from the restaurant. She waited for the small white man to appear on the sign before she crossed the street.

She wore a goofy grin on her face as she knew she'd see Eli in a matter of moments, but as she came to the front of the restaurant and could see through the window, her grin dropped and she felt like she was being crushed by a thousand rocks.

There he was, sitting at their favourite table, looking as handsome as ever, sitting with someone who wasn't her. A pretty girl, prettier than her, with blonde hair and a perfect little body with her perfect little lips pressed to his. Clare felt like all the air in her lungs escaped her and a tear fell down her face. She whipped it away quickly, turning around and walking back to her office, refusing to look back.

**Later that night…**

"What do you mean you didn't tell him!?" Bianca said through the phone.

"I mean actually what I said, I said I didn't tell him and that's it." Clare spat at her friend on the verge of tears.

"Clare, he's the father of your baby! You have to."

"No, I'm not telling him, not ever." Clare said, shaking her head as she struggled with the phone between her ear and shoulder and holding a glass full of water.

"Well why not?"

Then the tears fell from her sad blue eyes and the glass fell from her hand at the same time. The glass shattering as it landed on the floor, glass and water all over the place.

"What was that? Clare? Are you crying?"

Clare just sobbed harder and harder, but not because glass was on the floor and she ruined her favourite cup but because Eli broke her heart and he didn't even know it.

"I'm coming over." Bianca said quickly and the phone line went dead.

Clare slid her phone onto the counter of her kitchen and tried to calm her crying. She knew it was ridiculous to be this upset to the point where she could barely breathe from the amount of crying. They weren't together anyways, there wasn't supposed to be feelings, just sex, just fun between two friends. But here she was completely in love with him and pregnant with his child and everything was so messed up but he still didn't know anything was different.

The sad crying girl didn't know how much time passed by the time Bianca was opening her door, but she spent the entire time crying. And she spent every minute after that crying too, every minute until Bianca had lead her away from the glass to her room and left to clean up the mess Clare had made and returned to her bedroom.

By that time the tears stopped, there seemed to be nothing left in her to cry anymore. She just lay under her covers with sad, tired eyes as her best friend snuggled in next to her. Bianca didn't say anything and Clare didn't mind the silence, her head hurt from all the crying anyways. But she knew Bianca wanted to know, so staring up at her white ceiling she decided to speak up.

"You're right…" She said quietly, Bianca looked over at her. "I'm completely in love with him…"

Bianca smiled at her sadly knowing Clare wasn't finished speaking.

"And it took seeing him... kissing some other girl to realize that."

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So? How was this chapter?

Let me know with a review maybe?


	3. Chapter 3

Authors note: Hello! I thought I'd give you another chapter because I was feeling generous and because this wonderful idea struck me, so here you go. Also if there are spelling mistakes and grammar errors just be aware I'm posting this without it being edited by my cousin. Remember to read and review!

Disclaimer: Degrassi is still pretty shit, so I would never want to take any credit for the show.

Summary: They agreed to be friends… With benefits. No feelings, just sex. However, everything changes in more way than one.

* * *

You And I And A Plus Sign

Chapter Three

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He called every day and showed up at least three times a week to try to get her to talk to him. He was still clueless as ever and she had a twenty-two week prominent baby bump now reminding her of him every moment he wasn't trying to reach her.

Clare missed him a lot; she missed his laugh and his smile and his kisses. She missed the way his eyes lit up every time they watched his favourite movie and she missed the intimacy between them. She just missed the boy and everything about him.

But every time she picks up her phone ready to call or text him just a simple hey, she remembers why she stopped talking to him in the first place. She remembers his lips against some other pretty girl when Eli had made plans for lunch with her.

She loves a boy that doesn't love her the same way. She loves a boy who is the father of her baby and still doesn't know. She loves that boy but doesn't want to risk more heartbreak. Things were easier when she didn't see him, for herself and her baby and for Eli so he could be with the pretty girl.

Clare knew he had the right to know, it was his child too after all. It was fifty percent his. But she doesn't know how to tell him. If she saw him, she wouldn't have to say anything, he would know just from the look of her. She was showing quite a lot these days and their baby is very active too. Clare was actually quite surprised that she's gone this long without Eli finding out.

However, she decided that she wasn't going to put much worry in it. No one knew they were having sex with each other, other than Bianca and Clare knew Bianca wouldn't tell anybody.

Clare sat on the couch in her living room area, watching her TLC reality television shows. It was her last day of work before her sisters' movie premiere. There was one thing Clare thought Darcy wouldn't care to do and that was staring in a highly anticipated movie of the year, but somehow she did it and Clare was permanently confused on how that even happened.

Clare wasn't going to the premiere or the parties even though Darcy had begged and begged. Clare hadn't told any of her family yet. And she didn't exactly want her mother finding out she was with child on a magazine cover. So she agreed to have a family dinner with her parents and sister before Darcy had to hop on a plane for the next premiere.

It would be Sunday night and then her family would know and Eli still wouldn't and at least the third time she wandered if she should call him and invite him over to finally tell him.

Clare rested her hand on the top of her growing belly and rubbed her thumb against the skin there right near her belly button. She sighed contently. Almost every aspect of her life was perfect she had a very well-paying job, a fantastic apartment with lots of room, she has the best friend in the world, she is healthy, and her pregnancy is going incredibly well, but everything with Eli is messed up.

Then there was a knock on her door and her head turned to look at the door. The girl let out a long breath before she moved to get up from the couch slowly. She had an idea of who might be behind her door, but still went to check the door anyways. Clare flipped open the peephole and got on her tippy toes to look through it, her belly touching the door slightly.

"Clare?" Eli said from the other side of the door. He stood there with his hand stuffed in his pockets of his jacket.

Clare closed the flap that covered the peephole quickly and leaned her forehead on the door.

"Come on, I know you're home. Your car's in the parking lot."

Clare held her breath as if he could hear her breathing for a moment or two. He would have to leave eventually. She opened the flap and sighed sadly as she looked out at him, he was still as handsome as ever.

"I can see you opening the peephole, Clare." He said looking into it as if he could see her, though she knew he couldn't actually. "I don't understand why you're ignoring, Please, Clare." He begged now. "I just want to know why and I'll leave you alone if that's what you want."

Then Clare closed the peephole and took a step back. She thought to walk away and go to a room where she couldn't hear him until he left. Biting her lip she unlocked the door and opened it a crack so he wouldn't be able to see her stomach. The top chain lock still locked.

She saw him open his mouth to speak but she cut him off, "I... I think it's easier if we don't see each other anymore… Or speak." She said not looking at him through the crack.

"What?" Eli questioned. She could hear the sadness, hurt and confusion laced in his tone of voice.

"Go home, Eli." She demanded softly.

"Is this because of the benefits? Clare… We can stop." He pleaded.

She shook her head lightly, "It's not that." She said quickly.

"What is it then?"

"Nothing."

"Tell me what's wrong, Clare, and I'll try to fix it." He spoke. "I don't want to lose you."

She smiled sadly, "You already did."

And she shut the door before she could see the look on his face or hear a reply from him.

_**Sunday Afternoon…**_

After much protest from Clare, the pregnant girl waited for her sister to pick her up from her apartment. She had her own vehicle and was completely able to drive herself over to her parents' house, but Darcy insisted and tends to be very persuasive. So she waited nervously for her sister.

Clare held the strap of her over the shoulder bag with all her necessities in it. Clare unscrewed the cap to her water bottle and took a long sip of it before she heard a loud knocking on her door. With a nervous sigh, Clare did up the cap back on the bottle and put it in her bag before heading to the door.

Clare thought seeing her sister after so long would be a better thing, a happier thing. But she was five and a half months pregnant and hadn't told any of her family and she felt horrible about it. The girl let out a heavy breath through her nose and checked the door just to make sure it was Darcy for sure. She didn't want to open the door and see Eli standing there and luckily it was Darcy.

Clare knew it had to be done. She had to open the door and let Darcy know and then in a few moments later she'll have to do it all over again with her parents. They needed to know, she needed to tell them. She needed her mother's help. Clare didn't know the first thing about taking care of a child let alone a newborn baby.

So Clare unlocked the door and pulled it open. "Hey, Darc…" Clare said somewhat quietly.

Clare watched Darcy's expression change. Her eyes widened in shock along with her eyes starting to water. She didn't look upset and that was the only thing Clare was sure of.

"Oh my God…. Clare!" She exclaimed. "I didn't know you were pregnant… Mom and Dad never said-" Darcy said and placed a hand on her sisters growing stomach.

Clare placed her hand over her sisters and inhaled deeply. "I never told them." Clare told her.

"What?" Darcy said, Clare swore she saw a panicked look on her face for a moment.

"I didn't tell them... I'm going to today, it's not like I can hide it anymore. I didn't tell anyone… not even the baby's father." Clare finished with a sigh.

"Who… Is the father?" The older Edwards daughter finally moved her hand away.

"Uh... " Clare looked down as she hesitated to answer the question.

"… Do you not know?"

"I'm not whoring around, Darcy." Clare said with a bit of a roll of her eyes as she stepped out of her apartment and shut the door behind her.

"It's Eli's." Clare said point blank. "It's Eli's and there's not a chance it would be anyone else's because Eli is the only man I've ever had sex with in my entire life." Clare let her sister know.

"You know, my best guy friend, the one who took my virginity when the doctors thought I wasn't going to live for another three days." The curly-haired girl heard Darcy sigh when she finished talking.

"Now, can we go?" Clare said starting to walk down the hallway.

"Clare! I'm sorry, I didn't mean to make you upset." Darcy said sincerely as she held onto Clare's elbow to keep her from walking away.

Clare turned and nodded, "No, I'm sorry… I shouldn't snap that easily." Clare held her lip with her teeth and looked down at her stomach. "I need to work on not doing that."

Darcy pushed her lips to one side of her face and nodded slightly. "We're both sorry. Now let's move on."

"Okay." Clare said quietly in agreement.

Darcy pulled Clare into a hug right then and there in the middle of the hallway. Clare wrapped her arms around her older sister and sighed contently.

"I missed you, Clare." Darcy said barely above a whisper.

"I missed you too, Darc."

Then Clare giggled a bit, pulling away from the hug. "I think the baby likes its auntie already." Clare said placing her palm over the spot she felt the slight movement from her baby.

"Well good!" Darcy chuckled. "…Because I'm going to spoil it rotten."

Clare glanced at Darcy for a second and then rolled her blue orbs playfully. "We should go before we get a call from Mom and Dad." Clare reminded and pushed her lips together.

"…Probably." The older girl nodded as her dug into her pocket and pulled out her car keys, "Let's go." She twirled it around her finger and the two started the walk out of the building.

It wasn't too long in the vehicle before the two girls arrived at their parents' house, Darcy completely filled in with everything that had to do with the pregnancy.

It looked the same to Clare, except the curtains were different in the front window. It's been a long time since the last time Clare had been home to her parents, nearly 4 years. Their family get togethers were usually at Darcy's place or their grandparents now that they were older.

Clare smiled slightly as she looked out the window at the house. There were so many good memories there. There was baking with their mother for church events, Christmas mornings after they believed Santa came and dropped off toys, birthday parties like her sixteenth where she got her first kiss because of a game of truth or dare, and movie nights with Clare's friends where Clare and Eli always seemed to be cuddling by the end of the night

But with good came the bad. Like the morning Clare fell down the stairs and earned a bruise on her back that would not go away until they found out the cause of it, or when her first boyfriend confessed he couldn't be with her because he loved someone else, even when her uncle had a heart attack right in the middle of the dining room when she was eleven.

"Do you think mom and dad ever think to trim the awful brush fence? " Clare says with a bit of a laugh as Darcy pulls into the drive way.

Darcy shakes her head, "We've been telling them for years." She laughed along.

Clare turned away from her sister and went to open the door, but retreated her hand from the handle as she jumped slightly when her sister said her name in a quick and panicked way.

"What?" Clare looked over at her. "You scared me..." Clare shook her head.

"Maybe… Uh..." Darcy let out a breath.

Clare looked at her question all over her expression.

"I mean, I don't know how they're going to react… to the news of finding out about the baby…"

"Darc?-"

"Maybe I should go in and tell them before, you know, you walk in so they don't have a heart attack…" She chuckled nervously like she didn't hear Clare say her name. "Or something."

"Um.." Clare licked her lip and looked at her sister as if she took a bit too many of her crazy pills in the morning, something was off with her. "It's alright… You don't have to do that." Clare sighed and gripped on to the door. "I have to pee anyways."

And then she hopped out of the car and closed the door behind her. She started the walk to the front door and ignored Darcy's protests as she did since she wanted to get inside out of the cold spring air.

When she got to the front door and turned the door knob opened, she noticed just how quiet the house was. Usually there was music playing somewhere or her mother was singing some sort of song from the kitchen, but it was incredibly quiet and Clare began to worry.

"Mm..." Clare bit her bottom lip and looked over her shoulder to see Darcy shutting the door seeming nervous. She slipped off her shoes and hung up her coat.

She gripped the strap of bag and held it close to her and went to look around. The kitchen was empty as well as the living room and the small office and half bathroom, this only made Clare more and more concerned. The front door is never left unlock as her mother has a fear of someone breaking in.

"Hello?" Clare shouted up the stairs but there wasn't answer so called pulled out her phone and pressed her mother's number.

And then she heard it. The ringing of the cell phone came from the basement and Clare sighed and hung up before making her way to door under the stairs that lead downstairs.

"Clare! Clare…. Wait!"

Clare kept going and started walking down the stairs.

"Clare, please!" Darcy basically shrieked.

"What?" Clare snapped at her. "What is going on?!" She shook her head as she made her way all the way down the stairs. It was completely dark so Clare flicked the light on.

And it happened so quickly then.

"Happy Birthday!"

She nearly fell over due to being scared half to death.

Streamers were flung.

Confetti poppers were pulled

Everyone had smiles on their faces.

Everyone.

Bianca, Adam, her parents, her grandparents, and Spinner.

Alli, Jenna, K.C , Jake, Katie, Connor, Dave, and Eli.

_Eli. _

And then they noticed.

And then she noticed all the looks on their faces.

But mostly the look on Eli's face.

Jaw dropped.

Eyes locked on her growing abdomen.

_Hurt._

_Confusion. _

"Holy shit." Was what came out of his mouth.

Tears formed in her eyes as she looked at him and he looked back at her.

Blue eyes staring into ones of green.

So she turned and ran up the stairs to the first floor, then to the second and locked herself in her old bedroom and sat down on the old bed.

She didn't know what was worse; forgetting her own birthday or that now Eli knew.

She couldn't go back down there and face everyone, especially Eli. She could have dealt with the surprize party and the shock everyone else started to go through the moment they saw her. She could have but Eli was there, the father to a baby he didn't know about. And she knew she couldn't do it with him there. This isn't what she wanted.

She wanted to keep away from Eli to save herself from more heartbreak. She wanted to not tell him so he wouldn't feel the need to help out. She didn't want to ruin whatever he had going on with that other girl even though he ruined her and what they had. She just wanted him happy, but if she couldn't be the one to do it then she didn't want to see someone else take her spot in his bed.

She choked back a sob and glanced at the door when she heard a soft knocking on it.

"Go away." She cried. She prayed it wasn't Eli.

"Clare?"

She sobbed harder.

"Clare, please open the door." He said, moving the door knob slightly. "We need to talk about this!"

"No," She shook her head. "We don't."

"Goddamnit, Clare! Stop pushing me away. We have to talk about this and I'm not going to fucking leave until we do."

She didn't move at first, she just stared at the door and then sighed. She knew him well enough to know that he wouldn't move an inch until they spoke. So with much hesitance she moved to the door and unlocked it before stepping back. And then the door opened and Eli stepped in, he looked at her sadly.

He saw her puffy eyes with makeup messed all about her face, he saw the redness of her face and he saw her growing stomach again that he couldn't seem to take his eyes off of. Clare sat back down on the bed and pulled one of the pillows on her lap as Eli sat down next to her with a sigh. He rested his elbows on his knees and held his face in his hands. Clare watched his every move as her heart raced, wandering what he was going to say or do, or react.

After a few minutes of sitting in silence apart from the music playing down stairs now, Clare went to speak but Eli beat her to it.

"How far along are you?" He asked, not looking at her.

"…Twenty-two weeks and three days." She told him. "Five and a-"

"Half months and three days..." Eli finished. He ran a hand through his dark locks and he moved to face her. "Do you know the gender?" He asks.

"Yeah…" Clare said breathlessly. "It's a girl."

Clare saw a corner of his lips rise a bit. At least he was happy to hear that much.

"You had no intention to tell me did you?" He asked though she was sure he knew the answer.

But she shook her head no anyways.

"Why not?" He said after a moment, his voice quiet and hurt.

"I didn't want to burden you." She told him but only being half honest with him as she stared down at her hands resting on top of the pillow.

"Burden me?" He rolled his eyes but not at her. "You're not a burden. You've never been a burden to me, Clare."

"I am and I have and I will be, Eli. I don't want to ruin things for you."

"What things?!" He said throwing his arms into the air a bit as he stood up from the bed in frustration. "Clare, you're my fucking world, don't you get that?! You and our baby girl are not a burden to me nor ever will be. You haven't ruined anything; you make my life worth living."

"You don't mean that." She muttered not believing him.

"Yes I do." Eli said matter-of-factly.

"Then why were you kissing that other girl!" She snapped at him as she became angry at him in just a split second. "You invited me out for lunch and then I got there and you were kissing some other girl at _our _table." She continued talking with her hands. "If I'm so God damn important to you, what were you doing kissing her when you could have been kissing me."

Then the girl laughed and moved from her spot, getting up. "I am not your world and I won't ever be because all I was was the one you had sex with for fun." She shook her head sadly.

"Clare, that's not true." Eli reached for her hands but she yanked them away.

"I can't do it. I can't do this. I can't be around you anymore, I can't and I won't see you with someone else and have the constant reminder that I am not good enough for you to be anything more than your friend with benefits."

Eli let out a breath as if it was being punched out of him and Clare placed a hand on her stomach where she felt movement from the baby.

"I've been in love with you since high school, Eli. And I know you don't love me the same way that I love you so I can't watch you be in love with someone else… Again… It hurts too much. You don't need to be involved in the baby's life and you don't need to be involved in mine. I don't want to make things complicated for you and dating other people." She paused and took a step backwards, "Now you know and now I'd really appreciate it if you'd go so I can explain this whole mess to everyone downstairs." She pushed past him and went to leave her old room

But Eli caught her hand and he pulled her towards him so quickly she had no time to process what was happening before his lips were pressed to hers and she froze. She missed this and she was okay with it but was also completely surprized. So she kissed him back after a second or two. It was slow and meaningful and full of want from both mouths and she wanted this forever but he pulled away and held her chin with his thumb.

Their foreheads pressed against each other's and Eli spoke, "Don't say that I don't love you ever again." He commanded. "Because I do… I love you. I love every inch of your body and every gleam in your eye. I have loved you for so long that I've lost count of how many times I've wanted to tell you. I wanted to tell you when we were teenagers but then you fell down the stairs and soon after you were diagnosed with Cancer and it wasn't the right time."

"That girl you saw kissing me at our restaurant was that crazy one from a few years ago, Clare, she kissed me I pushed her away, you have to believe me.." He told her the truth. "I threw myself in these other relationships because I thought that would help me get over you but it only made me crave you more. These girls you thought I was in love with, I never actually was. It's you, Clare. It's always been you. I am truly, madly and deeply in love with you. And I'm sorry I've made you think I wasn't in love you but that's only because I thought you would never be in love with me the same way." He confessed to her in a hushed tone.

"Eli…"

"I want you and I want to be a part of that baby girl's life." Eli cut her off and Clare shook her head, their noses rubbing against each other as she felt this large happiness come over her.

"I want you and I want you to be a part of her life too." Clare told him as she moved her head away from his but wrapped her arms around his neck lightly.

"Does that mean what I think it means?"

Clare smiled a bit and nodded her head once. "It means I'm yours until the day we die, if that's what you want." She made clear to him.

"That's the only thing I want in the entire world." He said a smirk forming on his handsome face, "Girlfriend?" Eli said sounding a bit unsure.

Clare grinned at him and leaned up to peck his lips. "Glad to hear it, Boyfriend."

Eli smirked and kissed her again, it was short and sweet. It was chaste. When Eli pulled away the two stared at each other. They smiled and touched each other's faces with the pads of their finger tips and Clare felt a sense of relief wash over her. This was them and they were going to be okay. All three of them.

* * *

So? what did you think?

What do you hope to see happen?

Any name guesses even though all you know is the gender?

Let me know!


	4. Chapter 4

Authors note: Heyo! Sorry for the super late update! Life is kinda crazy right now (And I'm also kinda lazy and been watching too much anime, but shh) Also I've made a playlist for this fanfiction as a sorry, and you can find the link on my profile. Remember to read and review!

Disclaimer: Degrassi is still pretty shit, so I would never want to take any credit for the show.

Summary: They agreed to be friends… With benefits. No feelings, just sex. However, everything changes in more way than one.

* * *

You And I And A Plus Sign

Chapter Four

* * *

Eli smirked and kissed her again, it was short and sweet. It was chaste. When Eli pulled away the two stared at each other. They smiled and touched each other's faces with the pads of their finger tips and Clare felt a sense of relief wash over her.

This was them and they were going to be okay.

All three of them.

There was a knock on the bedroom door, but they both ignored it. They were too lost in each other's eyes. Clare adored his green eyes and he adored her blue ones.

There was a louder knock, but they still didn't move. And then another and another and then Clare heard her name. It got louder and louder. She looked towards the door as the voice continued and continued.

"Clare."

"Clare?"

"Clare?!"

"Wake up!"

Clare's eyes fluttered opened. And she realised she had been dreaming, she had been dreaming such a horrible, wonderful dream. She rubbed her makeup- less face and looked at the person who had woken her up.

"You were crying in your sleep." Eli said.

Clare felt like all the air was stuck in her lungs and she just couldn't get it out. She wondered if she had been sleep talking, she hoped to god she wasn't sleep talking. Crying in her sleep was enough to get him to be worried, she would hate if he heard her sleep talking and was now worried about that.

"I…" She glanced at his lap. She had fallen asleep while they were watching Eli's newest videos from his work, and now there was a large wet spot on his jeans from her tears. "I'm sorry about your pants." She said lamely. "I can put them in the dryer?"

"It's fine, Clare. It'll dry." He chuckled.

She flashed him a small smile and sighed. She hadn't told him about their baby and he never kissed some girl at their favourite restaurant and she was so relieved. That means she can tell him now, tell him about their baby and how head over heels she is for him and she prayed to God he felt the same because she wouldn't be able to handle anything that happened in her dream, except maybe the last part.

The part where she called him boyfriend and he called her girlfriend and they both said their "I love you's" She would be able to handle that. But if the boy she's been in love with since high school rejected her that's what she wouldn't be able to handle at all.

"Hey… Are you thinking about something?"

"What? Oh… Yeah. I guess, kinda." She shrugged and moved a bit away from him on the couch.

"Care to share?" He questioned as he turned off the television and twisted around a bit so he was facing her.

"Uhm.." Clare looked down at her little belly. There wasn't really anything there yet. She was 14 weeks pregnant, but it looked like nothing was different about her. But the doctor said that was okay and that it was normal to be small with your first baby. "I uh... Yes. Yes, I will share." She nodded, placing a hand on her stomach, absentmindedly.

"Okay?"

A few moments passed before she realised that this was the moment. "Oh! Yeah, wait here." She commanded as she hopped off the couch. She was going to tell him and he would finally know that he's the father, he's going to be a father, and they were having a baby.

She went to the bedroom and grabbed the ultrasound of their little one and shoved it in her pocket so he wouldn't see it just yet, then to the kitchen and grabbed three plastic cups from the space underneath the sink and hurried back to him.

Eli raised an eyebrow and she set each cup down on the table. "What are you doing, Edwards?"

"Shh, just wait."

She took out the ultrasound and folded it so he wouldn't see it and placed it in the middle cup, before turning each one upside down. "You saw which cup I put the picture in?" She asked him.

He nodded.

"Good." She smiled. "If you pick the cup with the picture in it you'll know what I was thinking about."

"Obviously tricks." He said.

"It's not a trick." She said seriously.

"Alright." He pushed his lips together, "This'll be easy."

Clare smirked slightly and began mixing up the cups again and again and again. She stopped after a bit and looked up at him. "Okay." She told him.

Eli picked up the cup on the left and threw it aside. There it was on the first guess. The ultrasound lie on the table and then Clare got nervous. She hoped he wouldn't reject her.

She watched as he reached for the photo, it felt like ten years went past by the time Eli finally touched it. She held her breath as he started to unfold it and looked at him curiously when he finally saw it.

He stared at it and stared at it as his mind tried to process it. Clare hoped the "Hi, Daddy." She wrote on it earlier would be enough for him to know what's going on. But he kept looking at him, not even glancing up at her. Clare was getting anxious now.

"Eli… Why are you not saying anything?" She asked after a few minutes passed.

"Oh my God." He finally said as he covered his face with his hands. She couldn't tell how he felt with the tone of his voice. "Oh my God." He said again and Clare swore he sounded like he was about to cry.

"You're pregnant?"

She saw him move his fingers a bit, but she could barely see his face, but she assumed he could see her, so she nodded.

"Oh my God." He said. He was definitely crying. "I have magical sperm."

Clare tried to hold back a smile, but it found its way onto her face. "I suppose you do." She said with a giggle.

"I'm so glad you're pregnant." He said.

Clare's eyebrows came together, "What?"

Eli moved rubbed his eyes clean from his tears, "You're pregnant. So that means it's not cancer."

"It's not cancer." Clare repeated.

Eli looked down that the ultrasound and smiled, "How far along are you?"

"14 weeks." She replied walking over to her previous spot beside him, "I found out last week."

"It's healthy?"

"Yes." Clare said. "Very healthy."

Eli let out a sigh and leaned back on the couch. "Wow."

"Eli?" Clare said suddenly.

Eli glanced over at her, "Yes?"

"I really want this baby… " She started, but looked away from him down to her hands, "And I know this ruins what we had going on… But I really want this baby after I was told I wouldn't ever be able to have kids… This is my miracle baby, so thank you even if it wasn't planned to happen."

"I think you mean _our _miracle baby_."_

Clare looked up at him, "Our."

"I know how your brain works, Clare Edwards, I want everything to do with this baby, so don't start thinking ever that I don't want to be a part of its life."

Clare nodded and wiped the single tear that had fallen from her eye, "I want you to be a part of my life too." She said quietly.

"I already am." Eli said. With his hand, Eli reached over and gripped her chin, bringing it up so he could see her face, "And I will be for the rest of your life."

Clare gave him and small smile, "I'm glad."

Eli leaned in and gave her a chaste kiss, "Marry me." He said.

Clare's eyes widened, "W-what?"

"Marry me."

"Eli…"

"I know I don't have a ring… but I will get down on one knee and ask again once I do. Until then, I'd really like to call you my girlfriend."

Clare's eyes filled up with tears and she smiled widely at him, "Until then, I'd really like to call you my boyfriend."

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Yes, chapter two (from when the Bianca and Clare part ends) and three was all a dream.

I thought I should clear that up in case some people were confused!

Anyway! Review maybe?


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